Hello. My Name Is _________

Almost all Asian-Americans have it. No, I’m not talking about lactose-intolerance. I’m talking about our “Asian” names. Chances are, if you’re a first generation Asian-American your parents gave you a western first name and your middle name was something from their native tongue. Sorry. It’s not like Rumpelstiltskin where if you guess our Asian name you get our first-born. It was our parents’ way of holding onto a piece of their cultural identity, just in case we got confused and thought we were Scottish or Danish.

My Korean middle name is Jisup (pronounced JEE-SUP). Growing up, I told people it was Joseph (pronounced JOE-SUF) because I got tired of people butchering my name and to avoid a lot of teasing (kids can be so mean). The worst part was your parent’s friends would scream out your Asian name when they would spot you with friends in a public place (Asian adults can be so mean).

Well, age heals a lot of insecurities and Joseph no longer exists. I can now freely offer my Korean middle name to anyone who asks (including a young Korean maiden at a bachelor party who demanded to know what my REAL name was). So next time you’re chumming around with a Far-East buddy, ask him or her for their Asian name. I would love to stay and chat, but I hear somebody calling my name.